I've known in my heart who I was carrying almost from the moment I knew I was pregnant. But in the last few weeks I started to doubt myself, mainly because The Gorilla was so convinced that it was the opposite.
But I just knew, in the place where you know things, the gender of this second little person in our lives.
Last week at our monthly doctor's appointment, I shrieked and almost slid off the table when the ultrasound technician said with a smile, "It's a...."
B O Y!
We are elated. We would have been just as ecstatic had it been a girl, truly. A sister for Pigtail would have made my heart sing in a wonderfully different way. But finally having confirmation on what my body has been whispering for sixteen weeks is deeply satisfying.
I've barely had time to process the news. My mind has been swirling for days. The Gorilla, on the other hand, was tossing out nursery paint colors before we even made it to the doctor's office elevator at the end of our appointment.
We have a name, sort of. Left over from when I was early pregnant with Pigtail, we have a loose idea of what we want to call this fella. I already think of him by name.
This pregnancy is so markedly differently from my first, so much less anxious and so much more joyous. The first time around you can't really imagine what it will be like to have a child. If you get the chance to do it again, you know the payoff and you count the minutes until you get to do it again.