On our last day of our beach weekend, I waded as far out into the ocean as I felt safe. It had been a long and difficult few months, fraught with illness and emotion. Every ounce of grace I could give myself for the way I handled the summer had dissolved weeks ago. I want to make some changes in the way I parent and wife and friend. I need to re-evaluate the way I spend my days. I must adjust the collage that’s in my head.
I let the waves take me up and then down again. I didn’t fight the current. I didn’t need to kick too hard to keep my head above water. I just rolled in the water, over and over and over again. I thought about the things I hadn’t let myself think about before. My brain and my heart seemed in sync for the first time in a long while. I stayed in the ocean, alone, for as long as I needed to before I was ready to emerge.
The waves had taken me a little further downshore, but not so far that I didn’t recognize the stretch of beach. As the water line lowered itself down my body, I saw my children and husband playing on the shore, dripping wet sand into buckets, waiting on me.
I’m taking my second annual August off of blogging. It comes at the most perfect time. While I do plan on limiting my time online, I won’t be a monk. I’ll be posting some to the HH facebook page (especially movie news!) and I could never give up Instagram. The easiest way to know when I’m back to posting is to subscribe to HH.
I have hopes for a good month, and plans to return in September within a renewed sense of purpose and content for this blog. A rest can bring nothing but strength.