After Dave died, we came straight to the lake. We've been here all summer, healing, processing, sitting in sorrow and letting in the moments of joy.
We didn't have the usual stacked up schedule of houseguests. There were full days when we didn't get out of our pajamas. The kids played outside a lot. The Gorilla and I sat close on the porch.
My husband's family has showed such incredible strength during this very difficult thing. Strength doesn't always look like you expect it to, that's what I'm learning.
We got some things done that we've been talking about for years. I sorted some things out, around the house and in my heart. The days have been long, slow cooking and slow moving. Such a necessary change from the happy chaos that usually swirls around the dock in our summers.
But after eight weeks, it's time to go home. Los Angeles, the place I claimed for myself this very week thirteen years ago. Often I think of Oklahoma or the lake as my safe havens, but LA is what I choose, where I met my love and created my family. It's my real life and I'm ready to return to it.
We will arrive in California changed.