hollywood housewife

an HH hug for YOUR sponsored child

I'm breaking my blogging fast to tell you about something that could possibly be amazing. 

I'm going to Sri Lanka in two weeks with World Vision.  As previously discussed, I am terrified.  This is way out of my depth.  Way out of my comfort zone. 

I'm determined to tell this story here from an honest place, with fresh eyes.  I've never done anything like this, and most of you haven't, either.  So in my heart and in my writing, I am preparing for this as if you are taking the journey with me.  From the sheer length of travel to the effects of child sponsorship, this is all new to me.

But, judging by some of the messages I've received, it is not all new to all of you.  Either you've followed other writers on their trips abroad, or your church or family has been involved with child sponsorship, or you just already know about the work World Vision is doing.  So, if it has crossed your mind that you might be interested in sponsoring a child in Sri Lanka, there is a chance that I will get to meet that child and hug them in your stead. 

Let me emphasize that it is not guaranteed.  But there is a probability.  I would love to hug them for you, maybe take a picture, transfer the love in person from you to them.  If this is of interest to you, please click HERE to select a child to sponsor from the areas where we'll be visiting.  It's important that if you want this to happen, you must use this link.  And then of course contact me so that I know.   

From what I understand so far about the agenda, we're going to be visiting an area where World Vision has been at work over a decade, and then an area in need where World Vision has just arrived.  There will be much contrast between the two, I am sure. 

Even though I still feel fairly clueless about the child sponsorship thing, when I found out that I could smile beside someone that you are helping and that you feel connected to, I couldn't wait to share it.  You have until next Wednesday, August 15.  (Of course you can sponsor a child from Sri Lanka or any of the places where World Vision is at work at any time.  But in order to arrange meeting any readers sponsored kids, the deadline is next Wednesday.)

I'm headed back to my non-blogging hole for just one more week.  Happy August!

to sri lanka with world vision

I'm excited, terrified, and humbled to tell you that next month I'll be a part of the World Vision blogger team headed to Sri Lanka. 

I've never done anything like this before.  I've never much thought about doing anything like this before.  Last year, a group of World Vision bloggers went to Bolivia.  As it happens, I was also invited on that trip, and I was relieved to say no quickly because of my pregnancy.  But a few of my favorite bloggers were on that trip - including Rachel Held Evans and Nish Weiseth - and I read their posts from afar, and I couldn't quite shake a feeling.

A few weeks ago, when World Vision contacted me regarding the opportunity to visit Sri Lanka and see firsthand the relief work there, I didn't have a single reason to turn them down.  And I looked for one.  But it was hard to say no when everyone around me - my husband, a close friend, a random stranger at a party - was screaming yes.  So I have stepped forward in faith, my whole being paleing at the thought.

Now that I'm used to the idea, I'm excited to step out (way, way out) of my comfort zone in this way.  And I'm overjoyed to share the experience with you.  If all goes as planned, I'll be blogging, tweeting, and Instagramming my way through Sri Lanka August 26 - September 1.

I really like what I know so far about World Vision.  Although I've been personally wary of the child sponsorship model in the past, I have to admit that I've been uninformed and am curious to learn more about how the child sponsorship thing actually works.  (A great read addressing this topic from Rachel Held Evans: Confessions of a Sponsorship Skeptic.)

It has always been my intention to have a charitable section of this blog.  In the fall of 2010, I hosted a little something called Housewife Heart.  There is so much good in this world, and so much need in this world, and it's easy to get lost in the I Don't Know Where To Start.  My husband and I talk all year about how to give back in our communities, in our country, internationally.  But too often the conversation ends at talking. 

Next month I hope to stop the talking and start seeing.  Truly seeing. 

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I am excited to learn more and then share more about child sponsorship through World Vision.  This link answers some basic questions.  If you have questions, I'd love for you to ask them now or over the course of the next month, so that I can get them answered. 

This is going to stretch us, friends.  I'm so glad you'll be with me on the journey.

left and right handed

"But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." (Matthew 6:3-4, NIV)

I received this comment on one of the {Housewife Heart} posts:

I feel like it's a personal mission for each family. I commend you for drawing attention to the charities, but for us, the giving is very close to our heart and something that I do not tell others about when I do it. I hope you have found what is close to the heart as well.

I was going to respond in the comments, but then decided that maybe this is something that should be shared for all my readers. 

I want to say that I understand the commenter's thoughts and that I knew that the way I went about the Housewife Heart project might not be for everyone.  In fact, when I first came up with the idea, I stalled on it because of the perception.  I worried about the perceived motivations and I worried about - frankly - the tackiness of such a project.  Actually, I received less criticism than I geared myself up for. 

So for those of you who maybe wanted to say something about the project and didn't, I want to offer a brief explanation for why I went forward with it.  Outside of my clearly stated reasons for Housewife Heart - to educate my readers and myself on worthy charities - I came up with two  arguments for why I took on Housewife Heart and why we shouldn't always stay silent on our charitable endeavors:

Giving Is Contagious.  I believe that when a friend or someone you like shows you how they support something - monetarily or otherwise - it motivates those around them to also get involved.  Sure, we all hope we have the moral fortitude to give faithfully in a charitable manner, but sometimes it falls by the wayside unless pressed.  I don't mean in a peer pressure way, I mean in a logistical way.

For example, when there's a natural disaster somewhere across the country, don't we all sit and stare at the screen mesmerized in sadness?  And don't we think - or say - "I just wish I could help."  Since most people cannot leave their daily lives to physically help the affected area, the next best thing is to send money to an individual or organization that is on the ground helping.  But then these thoughts run through your head:

Didn't that [major charity] get a bad reputation for some money mismanagement after the last natural disaster?

or

I applaud what that friendofafriendofafriend is doing there, but where would my money actually go? 

Or even

How much should I send?  How much do you think _____ actually sent?  We really need a new dishwasher and sending a check in the mail is a stressful risk I can't handle right now.

Before long, all thoughts of actually helping have left our minds.  Unless.  Unless your neighbor or your church or your sister offers up an easy way to help.  They've already done the research or they explained how they worked out the finances in their family.  It gives you a place to start. 

Giving Needs A Goal.  Originally, I was going to keep the ending donation vague and hope that everyone just got into the spirit of the thing.  But when I was discussing with my husband how much we would be willing to give to a charity chosen by my readers, I realized that all projects work best when there is a tangible end.  In this case, the tangible end goal was a donation of a specific amount.  

When goals are stated clearly, they are more likely to be attained.  I encourage you to set a goal in your family centered around charitable giving.  Whether it's a percentage of income or a certain number of hours per month, you're more likely to find a means if the end is specific. 

I also love the idea of group giving.  If a group of friends or neighbors sponsors a project together (perhaps alternating by month or delegating tasks), it keeps everyone accountable, which is sometimes all we need not to let the laziness win. 

Our Housewife Heart donation to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation is not the only charitable giving our family has done this year.  We have a small handful of causes that we've been involved with for several years, and recently a few new opportunitues have presented themselves for future involvement.  I have not highlighted any of these organizations - although I might eventually - nor am I in the business of discussing specific dollar figures on much of anything around here.

Money is such a tricky, tricky, subject.  Discussing it is a social taboo and between friends it becomes complicated.  I do hope that the {Housewife Heart} project came across as intended, and, far from feeling defensive, I want to welcome all types of discussion at HH.

photo by nathanmac87

{housewife heart} recipient announcement

You can see it for yourself right there in the left hand sidebar, but I'm proud and humbled to announce that the first recipient of the {Housewife Heart} is the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. 

You can read about the nomination for the CFF here.

There is so much that I can say about the {Housewife Heart} project.  What it meant to me, what it meant to you, how I'll do it differently next time.  Thank you, dear readers, for your nominations, your messages, your votes, and your overall support. 

From this project, The Gorilla and I learned new ways to give and how we prefer to give.  I think that every few years it would be good to reevaluate your charitable giving, to make sure that it is in line with your family mission and that the organizations you're giving to are striving for their own excellence.  One of the many ways we can, as humans, keep one another accountable. 

As for {Housewife Heart}: Goal accomplished.

friday links - charities to check out

There were so many good nominations to {Housewife Heart}.  I wish that I we could have given to at least a dozen.  We narrowed it down to the three that made the most sense for us, but I compiled some of the nominations for you here.  They are separated into categories to make it easier to browse. 

Make sure and vote for the recipient of the {Housewife Heart} donation.  Voting ends tomorrow at noon. 

(Note: If you decide to give to any of these charities, please do your due diligence.  For a guide on how to do that, see my mom's post on Grantmaking 101.  Also, if I didn't include here a charity you nominated, please do not take it personally.  I either didn't have enough information on the cause, or it didn't quite fit with Housewife Heart or I'm a scatterbrain.)

 

**Golden Star Runner's Up**

 

CHILDREN

Brain Tumor Foundation for Children  (Atlanta) Helping children with brain and spinal cord injuries and their families by providing financial support, social services, and latest information.

Camp Laughing Child  (Mexico) A therapeutic adventure camp serving institutionalized HIV+ children from major cities in Mexico. Their goal is to host the first camp for pediatric AIDS victims during the Christmas season of 2011.

Cottage Cove (Nashville) Serving up to 75 children each weekday, CC is a daily out-of-school or after school program that gives at-risk kids opportunities. This is includes school tutoring, but also training in photography, music, crafts, and computers.

Child Abuse Network (Tulsa) Changing the model for child abuse investigation, providing a single, safe, environment for professionals to work with children to determine of child abuse has occurred.

Childrens Hunger Fund (San Antonio) Working w/ a network of churches, they target families in need and directly help them.

Inspire Life Skills (Corona, CA) Life skills training for those aging out of the foster care system, including housing and employment assistance.

Kids Across America (Branson, Missouri) To build Christian leaders by encouraging, equipping, and empowering young urban youth and their mentors through sports camping.

NorthStar Youth Ministries (Birmingham, Alabama) NSYM strives to provide the youth and their families programs that are comparable to the best in the greater Birmingham area, with a special interest in the arts.

Operation Smile (Norfolk, Virginia) Free facial surgery for children around the world for cleft lip, palate, or other facial deformities.  As little as $240 and 45 minutes provides the surgery.

Shiloh Youth Camp (Oklahoma City) A day-camp experience for inner city kids.

Stand Up For Kids (Atlanta-based) Helping homeless teenagers living on the street in cities across America.

WOMEN'S INTEREST

Time To Fly (Reston, Virginia) Faith based domestic violence intervention and prevention training to women and their children.

City Team Philadelphia (Philadelphia) Providing food, shelter, tutoring, and gently used items for moms in areas of poverty in Philly.

Mercy Ministries Ministry helping young women (ages 13 – 28) with issues such as pregnancy, drugs addiction, depression, and eating disorders.

AFRICA

Amazima (derived from Kisses from Katie) (Uganda) A child sponsorship program, matching orphaned children who are unable to afford schooling with sponsors anywhere in the world. Sponsors pay $300.00 per year to send these children to school and provide school supplies, 2 hot meals each day, and needed minor medical care. 

Kids Across Africa (Rwanda) modeled after the Kids Across America camps that for the last thirty years have sought to help young people from America's inner cities discover God’s love and purpose for their lives. KAAC-R will also offer Rwandan young people a terrific opportunity to learn leadership skills, enjoy a variety of exciting sports and activities and build relationships with caring group leaders.

Racham Ministries (Uganda) A children’s home whose doors are open to any baby or child in need of a safe place to dwell.

Serving His Children (Uganda) “To serve food to the hungry, hope to the hopeless and rest to the weary. To be a place of refuge, love, safety and encouragement where hope is not just given but becomes a lifestyle.”

OTHER

Folds of Honor (Owasso, Oklahoma) Providing education scholarships to children of veterans who were killed or disabled during their service.

National Marrow Donor Program - Monetary gift could help people afford transplants, or find a match

US Air Force Academy Parent's Club (Detroit) Parents club for new cadets to provide support during their first year.

Kindness, Inc. (Elgin, Illinois) No-kill animal shelter, does not sell nor donate their animals to science. will take in animals that are no longer wanted.

The Spero Project (Oklahoma City) Connecting people with the relationships and resources they need to take the 'next step' in confronting issues they care about in their local and global communities.

Modest Needs - Giving small donations to help others.  Sort of like the Craig's List of charitable giving.  A very interesting concept.

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We have a big weekend planned - the last before the BIG big weekend. 

Happy weekend, HH readers!

{guest post} grantmaking 101

She needs no introduction.  My mom knows of which she speaks.

I’ve spent nearly 25 years managing grantmaking for a large private foundation and administered over $200 million in grant funds. The grants ranged from $1,000 to many millions of dollars. But making these grants was not much different than making ordinary individual charitable contributions, except for the zeros.

What did we look for in a good grant request? Because the rules for private foundations are so rigorous, we first made sure the grantee had a current IRS letter that said it was recognized as tax exempt under Internal Revenue Code Section 501(c)(3). The individual donor should also look for 501(c)(3) designation. That means that the organization does not pay any income tax and that donors may deduct their contributions from their taxable income. If there are any questions about tax deductible status, the IRS publishes a list of recognized organizations. It’s a bit cumbersome to search, but begin by visiting the IRS website and search for “Publication 78”. Or use this link.  (NOTE: Churches do not have to have an IRS letter. Also, contributions to subdivisions of the state or federal government are deductible as long as the gifts are made for “public purposes”).

Next, think about what you want to accomplish. Do you just want to provide general operating support to an organization because you love the good work that it does? Then that gift is easy to make. But you may want to look at its financial track record first. You can look up its IRS Form 990 on the web at Guidestar. This is the information form it files each year, and it includes total gifts and grants received for the year, program service revenues (This means the funds it receives for doing its charitable program.  For example this would include admissions from a museum, tuition for a nonprofit private school, insurance and private payments from a rehab center, etc.), investment income, and all expenses. The 990 also includes a list of the members of the governing board, the highest salaries, and much more.

There are also a couple of groups that “rate” charities. I’m not providing a link because I don’t always agree with their opinions. But you can search for them on the web easily enough. The primary problem I have with them is that they get really excited about high fundraising costs or high administrative costs. I look for these characteristics also (especially high salaries), but sometimes there’s a good reason for them. An organization that starts up a big fundraising campaign for a new building, for instance, might spend a lot of money up front in one year for consultants, printing, etc. Same with an organization that raises most of its money from direct mail solicitations. That’s an expensive way to raise money, but it can also mean survival to certain organizations. And an organization that uses volunteers heavily in their programs may appear to have a high overhead or administration ratio. But that’s because they don’t include the in-kind contribution of the volunteers. Locally, I see a free health clinic that spends most of its money on the executive director and a couple of staffers. If you used ratios to evaluate its operations, it would fail all the tests. But all the direct service is provided free by doctors, dentists, and allied health professionals. It is a very efficient organization. So instead of using ratios, I like to use good sense! 

What else do I look for in evaluating a grant request, after I’ve confirmed that it has met the tax requirements? First, I evaluate the viability of the organization. I look at its operations and try to figure out if it will be operating for many years to come, especially if the grant is for a project with a long life (e.g. building or endowment). Does it have a good operating track record? Does it seem to have a good donor base? Is it spending money efficiently? Then I look at the project. Is it a project that I like? Does this seem to be the right organization to be doing this project? Is the project well planned? Will the organization be able to achieve the goals it has described? If the project is new, does the organization have the right people in place to make it successful? You would be surprised at how often an organization that is barely “making it” will strike out on a new expensive project without the funds to be able to see it through. And sometimes it works. Sometimes the new program area boosts the rest of the programs. But oftentimes it just sucks more of the resources out of the successful programs than can be sustained. Again, try to use good sense (which can really be hard when you have a real soft spot for a program).

Managing a nonprofit organization is very hard, and it’s especially hard to evaluate success. Sometimes executive directors engage in “empire building”, thinking a bigger organization with more employees is a good measure of success. Sometimes organizations try to run too many people through its programs, thinking a high head count is more impressive than a smaller head count with better outcomes per person (it’s easier to count heads than evaluate individual outcomes). Sometimes a governing board skimps on fundraising costs, maybe not hiring a development person (the fundraising person) when he or she would really raise many more dollars than the cost of the salary. Sometimes the governing board just isn’t paying attention. They don’t ask enough questions, don’t require current accurate financial information, because it’s easier to just listen to a glowing report and go home.

So how can you pick out a good cause when you don’t already have something in mind? Look for one that you know about personally or can find out about (e.g. a friend that uses their services, is on their board, or is a regular donor). Or look for one with results you can see (a local arts program or homeless shelter). Or look at other donors to the organization. Institutional donors (private foundations, corporations) usually have done the due diligence for you. Look at the donor lists in the IRS Form 990-PF of private foundations that fund the kind of projects you like (hello, Guidestar). Look at the corporate support placards at fundraising events. And then follow your heart.

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Can you see how much I've learned from her?  This is one of the most important posts that has ever appeared at Hollywood Housewife.  I hope that you've learned something to help with your charitable giving decisions. 

This has been part of my {Housewife Heart} series, dedicated to learning more about charities and the ways in which we donate.  If you haven't yet, please vote in for the recipient in the Housewife Heart project.  Voting ends Saturday. 

Photo by Vince Alongi

{housewife heart} vote!

             

Last week I revealed the three finalists in my {Housewife Heart} project: Father Martin's Ashley, Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, and Charity: Water. 

Out of all the nominations I received, I chose these three carefully, weighing a few factors:

1)  That I was able to understand the cause either through the reader's nomination & explanation or through other materials.  It was important to me to understand the problem, the solution, and the means.

2)  That the cause was deemed "legitimate" through Guidestar.

3)  That the cause touched me or The Gorilla in some way, since we mean to stay involved in charitable giving and want the ultimate outcome in the {Housewife Heart} project to be education and a relationship with an organization we care about.

Thank you for your nominations, Thank you for talking me through some of the charities, and thank you for sticking around to learn about them. 

Now is the really fun part: voting!  You'll see the voting form in my left sidebar.  Please vote on the cause you would like to see receive a $2,000 donation.  Each IP address only gets one vote, so choose wisely!  And if you feel really strongly about the winner, you'll have to send your friends over to cast their vote.

Voting closes Saturday, October 9 at noon and I'll announce the winner next Sunday.

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The {Housewife Heart} project isn't done quite yet.  I received so many incredible nominations that I'll be highlighting some of them later this week.  I would love to hear if any of my finalists or any of the other nominations spurred something in you.  After all, one of my main goals for the {Housewife Heart} project is to light the fire for charitable giving. 

Also this week: my mom is going to give us a brief tutorial on how to give in a smart way.  You won't want to miss that.     

{housewife heart} finalist - charity: water

{Housewife Heart} is a project dedicated to educating myself and my readers on valuable causes.  A few weeks ago, I asked friends and readers to send me causes and charities close to their heart.  Out of those submitted, my husband and I chose a few that spoke to us in some way.  I will highlight those and then let you, my readers, pick which cause receives a donation of $2,000.  You can find further explanation of the project here. 

While I tend to support domestic causes, The Gorilla has always had a pull towards Africa.  In Charity: Water, we found a cause that we both agree on.

Like, the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, Charity: Water was nominated to Housewife Heart by more than one person.  I was impressed by the website and the charity's clear objective.  Of every cause I researched, the Charity: Water website was the easiest to understand.  The outlined the problem, the solution, and told me exactly how a donation would be used.    

Right now, almost a billion people on the planet don’t have access to clean, safe drinking water. That’s one in eight of us.  Charity: Water is a non-profit organization bringing clean, safe drinking water to people in developing nations. They use 100% of public donations to directly fund sustainable water solutions in areas of greatest need. Just $20 can give one person clean water for 20 years. 

Unsafe water and lack of basic sanitation cause 80% of diseases and kill more people every year than all forms of violence, including war. Children are especially vulnerable, as their bodies aren't strong enough to fight diarrhea, dysentery and other illnesses.

 

A donation to Charity: Water would aid in the water sanitation and hygiene education that is desperately needed in developing countries.

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Charity: Water is the third finalist in the Housewife Heart project.  The first two are Father Martin's Ashley and The Cystic Fibrosis Foundation.

{housewife heart} finalist - cystic fibrosis foundation

{Housewife Heart} is a project dedicated to educating myself and my readers on valuable causes.  A few weeks ago, I asked friends and readers to send me causes and charities close to their heart.  Out of those submitted, my husband and I chose a few that spoke to us in some way.  I will highlight those and then let you, my readers, pick which cause receives a donation of $2,000.  You can find further explanation of the project here. 

The week I announced Housewife Heart, we found out that friends of ours had a baby that had been diagnosed with cystic fibrosis.  Late in the week, The Gorilla and I were at at a restaurant for a date night and I was telling him about some of the nominees to Housewife Heart project and mentioned The Cystic Fibrosis Foundation and the timeliness of that with regards to our friends.

The restaurant was loud and crowded and we were sitting in a high-backed booth.  

A woman who must have been walking by stopped short by our table.  "I'm sorry," she interrupted, "were you just discussing cystic fibrosis?" 

She went on to tell us about her child and his life with CF.  Her intention was to pass along to our friends that the disease is no longer a death sentence, and that there is hope in those early dark days.  We talked for probably fifteen minutes and she mentioned the CFF as an excellent resource.

I knew that night - having never had an experience like that in Los Angeles - that the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation would be one of the finalists for Housewife Heart.

Cystic fibrosis is an inherited chronic disease that affects the lungs and digestive system of about 30,000 children and adults in the United States (70,000 worldwide). A defective gene and its protein product cause the body to produce unusually thick, sticky mucus that clogs the lungs and leads to life-threatening lung infections and obstructs the pancreas and stops natural enzymes from helping the body break down and absorb food.

In the 1950s, few children with cystic fibrosis lived to attend elementary school. Today, advances in research and medical treatments have further enhanced and extended life for children and adults with CF. Many people with the disease can now expect to live into their 30s, 40s and beyond.

The mission of the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation, a nonprofit donor-supported organization, is to assure the development of the means to cure and control cystic fibrosis and to improve the quality of life for those with the disease.

As a mother, reading about cystic fibrosis breaks my heart in a different way than it would have a year ago.  A donation to the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation would mean 2,000 tiny steps towards eradicating this ugly disease.

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The Cystic Fibrosis Foundation is the second finalist in my Housewife Heart project.  Read about the first finalist - Father Martin's Ashley - here. 

{housewife heart} finalist: father martin's ashley

{Housewife Heart} is a project dedicated to educating myself and my readers on valuable causes.  A few weeks ago, I asked friends and readers to send me causes and charities close to their heart.  Out of those submitted, my husband and I chose a few that spoke to us in some way.  I will highlight those and then let you, my readers, pick which cause receives a donation of $2,000.  You can find further explanation of the project here. 

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I was so touched by the thoughtful submissions to Housewife Heart.  The Gorilla and I looked at every single one and narrowed it down to a few that stood out to us, and that we would be comfortable helping monetarily. 

I will present the finalists here this week, giving each it's own post.  After we've all heard all the information, I'll give you one week to vote for the cause that spoke to you or that you think would most benefit from a donation.  I will also briefly highlight some of the great causes I learned about but that didn't make the short list for our family. 

The hope is that by the end of this, we've all learned something and possibly even made a connection to a cause that could use our time or dollars.

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The first finalist for Housewife Heart is Father Martin's Ashley, a rehabilitation facility in Maryland treating those who struggle with alcohol or drug addiction.  Father Martin's Ashley offers both in-patient and out-patient treatment based on the 12-step recovery method.  Contrary to it's name, the facility is not affiliated with any religious organization.

In the past three years, both The Gorilla and I have been directly affected by loved ones with substance abuse problems.  One was highly publicized, and the other was within our extended family.  We know firsthand the havoc this wreaks on lives. 

The HH reader who submitted Father Martin's wrote,

"The thing I think that you would understand about a place like this and how a donation would help is that addiction crosses everyone, poor, rich, male, female, children, black, white, etc.  The one thing that is discriminatory is the cost of treatment."

Before it directly affected me, I didn't understand the complications of addiction.  Diagnosing and treating it is not cut and dry.  From the facilities website,

"Ashley is so much more than "rehab". We combine education, compassion, love, spiritual support and medical and psychological treatment to help addicts and their families recover from the devastating affects of addiction.

 

Our philosophy is that every addict and alcoholic is worth saving."

Father Martin's Ashley is located in beautiful Maryland, where The Gorilla went to high school.
  A donation to the treatment center would make a difference in the lives of an addict and in the lives of addicts families.  

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Make sure you check back, I'll be highlighting different causes all week in addition to my regular Hollywood Housewife content.  Speaking of, let's reconvene for Mommy Monday later this afternoon.