We had a meaningful weekend with friends, time together in the midst of lots of work, travel, and the heartbreak of the nation.
Sweet fella gets stuck in pink hand-me-downs more often than he should.
It was nice to have lots of hands on deck to love on my kiddos. I've given a thousand extra kisses in the past few days.
I'm so grateful to be able to.
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We have this little sign that sits on the patio at the lake house that reminds us where we are, in case for a moment we forgot.
When we arrived this summer, it greeted us a little worse for the wear. The "L" had completely broken off and within days the "e" had rolled away.
I fixed it with gorilla glue and gave it a bit of a facelife. (Beware that gorilla glue foams, so don't use too much of it. I was able to peel this excess off with a knife, but that wouldn't work if you were fixing something that you weren't about to paint.)
A couple of coats of green spray paint (because that's what color I was in the mood for) made it as good as new. Maybe a little globby, but not bad. I put it on top of the book shelf next to the huge fiberglass fish, so you don't even notice the imperfections.
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In our bedroom at the lake house, we have corner with an artists easel and art supplies for my artist husband. But the thing is, there are WAY more fun and stimulating activities at the lake than painting. So for three summers now that easel has sat empty.
I got tired of looking at it, so I bought a piece of black foam board and threw a bunch of recent pictures on it. (Note: did you know that wal-mart prints your pictures instantly with options for a matte finish AND white borders. This is amazing to me. If wal-mart can do it, why can't everywhere? Is that a dumb question?)
Now it's more interesting to look at and Pigtail will stand in front of it and name the people in the pictures. So it's cute and educational.
I've also completely organized the kitchen cabinets and laundry room, both things I've been meaning to do for ages. I won't bore you with details but suffice it to say that one gets awfully productive when they're trying to distract themselves from thinking about something.
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(We are actually doing okay over here. Quality time with friends and family has made the transition from shock to healing easier. I haven't been taking as many pictures lately, my usual desire to document has been diminished. Kind of like how it feels rude to laugh at a joke, even though that's irrational. As expected, we're learning lots about ourselves, our life, and each other. Thanks for bearing with me.)
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I hope you had a wonderful holiday weekend. We're still enjoying ours with loads of family, friends, food, and tubing.
And pink lemonade popsicles.
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I really wanted this summer to be about Not Waiting. Somehow the end of last year became an endless cycle of Waiting For The Next Thing and I was aware of how antsy, how desperate, I felt most days but wasn't sure how to make it better.
Waiting for the remodel to finish, Waiting for Pigtail to walk, Waiting for the movie to be over, Waiting to get pregnant.
Then all of those things happened. After the movie was over, Pigtail toddled around a finished bathroom, in the same space where I found out I was pregnant again.
Then what?
Pregnancy sickness set in and I felt like my heart hit the reset button.
Waiting to puke, waiting to not puke, waiting for a friendship to heal, waiting for this blog to write itself, waiting to escape to the lake.
Then all of those things happened.
Now it's almost July and I've spent five weeks at the lake, purposefully Not Waiting. It's been a perspective check that I needed and dreaded.
I think I've finally hit a different sort of reset button.
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The shock has started to wear off and is replaced by a heavy sadness. For the first few days last week, I couldn't make my thoughts form a straight line. I would walk into one room and start a task, then wander into another room and stand there unsure of what I was supposed to be doing.
Grief is something that comes in waves. I'll forget for a little bit and then think to myself, "Why am I so out of it?" And then I'll remember. Or I'll think, "Has anyone told Ryan?" And then I'll remember.
The public-ness of this has been an added element, especially given the circumstances of this tragedy. I truly appreciated this post, and the thoughts behind using a celebrity death as an object lesson.
For me, I'm now focused on my husband as he goes through this difficult time. In an effort to return to some semblance of normality, I will resume my regular posting schedule tomorrow.
I cannot thank you enough for your thoughts, prayers, and messages. I wish I could respond to every single one. Our family has been bouyed by the outpouring of love for RD and condolences from friends and strangers.
Thank you for making the world seem smaller and bigger all at the same time.
Comments on this post are closed.
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Pigtail and I were enjoying what has become our evening lake ritual when our friends pulled up to the dock. My toddler was as naked as the day she was born splashing in a plastic tub, and I was bare belly out on the lounge reading a book about Motley Crue.
As we all greeted one another and commented on the beautiful sunset, I felt so far from Los Angeles. I'm so grateful for the balance.
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For your weekend reading pleasure:
If you're a fellow blogger and, like me, you're frequently confused about the PR side of it in relation to the online world, I thought this was a good read. (In Good Taste)
Also on the topic of blogging (can you tell that it's been on my mind lately?), Momcomm is a blog about blogging and I've found her tips and insights really interesting. I especially like her individual blog critiques. (MomComm)
It's too late for me to do anything like this for my pregnancy, but I like looking at the things that other people do. Mama Mia's Maternity Book (Hanna Mac Photography)
I have always liked Nadine Jolie: I get Botox. I like it. Sue me!
Darren Rowse is such a fount of information on so many things: 21 Settings, Techniques, and Rules All New Camera Owners Should Know. (Digital Photography School)
This book of notes that someone made for their husband was easily the best thing I saw this week. I just love stuff like that. (hello, friend)
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If you haven't yet, make sure you enter the Maya Brenner states necklace giveaway. You have until tonight to leave a comment on the post, and I'll post the winner over the weekend.
I hope that you have a wonderful Father's Day weekend. I just love June.
Happy weekend, HH readers!
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We are loving the lazy days of summer at the lake. We made cupcakes. Funetti with rainbow chip icing, my favorites.
Pigtail had to walk away to unwrap and inspect hers in private. She is her mother's child.
But the evidence was soon clear.
Cupcakes are a hit in this household.
Mischievous girl.
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I'm not a very adventurous cook, but my mom is the type who just whips together whatever is in the fridge and it tastes great. This weekend at the lake we had some friends over for dinner. She made a great summer meal with this as the entree.
From mom:
I wanted something to brighten up the chicken breasts for company, so I sautéed about half a red bell pepper and half a green bell pepper in butter, added less than a cup of store-bought fresh mango salsa (it was just raw mangos, red onion, cilantro and maybe a couple of tiny pieces of jalapeno), then added maybe a half cup of a prepared sweet and sour sauce and a little water. I had to season it up with some garlic and salt and pepper to overcome the vinegar in the prepared sauce, but it turned out OK.
The chicken was sautéed in butter and oil (about half and half) and seasoned with a prepared spice for grilling chicken plus garlic salt and pepper. The breasts had been pounded first, but they were still pretty large and thick, so I cooked them long enough (at least half an hour) to get pretty brown. Because they were so large, I sliced them thick, maybe 1 inch slices, and poured half the mango sauce over them. I put the remaining sauce on the table for individual use. The presentation was really pretty and colorful.
The cook time didn't make it exactly quick, but it was delicious and we had a lovely dinner with friends and strawberry shortcake for dessert.
Sometimes I think I prefer heavy winter food to eat, but nothing beats a true summer meal.
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The Gorilla and I purchased a vacation home in late 2008. It seems so serious. It is not serious. It is wonderful. And the story, in all its detail, is like a miracle to us.
Last week we made our annual move to our southern lake home. There is no better way to describe what this place means to us than the words I wrote just weeks after the purchase in December 2008. I re-post these thoughts every year at the beginning of the season to remind myself of how special this place is, and how much it has meant to our life.
For the past two summers, we have enjoyed several months here and our affection for this home, this town, and these people has only deepened.
But in case you get the wrong idea, let me assure you, this ain't the Hamptons.
I used to believe in fairy tales. I believed in The One person you were sent on this earth to marry. I believed in the magic of the Christmas season and a God who was interested in your every daily doing.
And then…
I’m not sure if I can blame this on California or just aging - or a combination of both - but I found myself becoming jaded to the mysteries and pixie dust of this world. A series of small disappointments here, a dull heartache there. I slowly talked myself into being “reasonable.” A gradual erosion of wonders.
Now I can’t say that life didn’t occasionally surprise me or that I turned into a big old Scrooge. I guess in my head I just sort of thought I “grew up.” And then something happened so out of the blue, so unmistakably from a Hand above.
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We have officially kicked off the summer at our lake house, which means friends and boats and lightening bugs and lemonade.
Today we are grateful for those who have served our country at any time. With military members on both sides of our family, we are always aware that freedom isn't free.
Happy Memorial Day!
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PS - We've been struggling with the internet connectivity since we arrived, and the holiday weekend hasn't been a great time to get help fixing it. A solution is hopefully on the way! As soon as I'm up and running again, I'll post the winner of the Christina Elaine bag and regular HH content will resume. Also, I'll sleep easier.
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